This is a set of questions about people I have come to
stick to when I am on social media. Answering these have served me very
well getting myself out of unnecessary trouble. It is in no way a complete guide on general discourse, but can help you decide
whether it is worth to talk to a stranger online or not.
1) Does the stranger make assumptions of
your intention?
If stranger already assumes something
about you, he is already biased. Stranger will then not necessarily
seek to discuss with you, but confirm those biases they have with
your or your intentions. Sometimes, being clear about your intention
helps resolving a conflict and I recommend doing this if you think
stranger is not aware of your true intention.
2) Does the stranger make assumptions
about you that you know does not apply to you?
This is similar to the first point.
However here, stranger has already made an assumption about your
character as a whole, making them likely to use ad hominems or
similar strategies against you. Realize that you do not have to
defend yourself from these kind of people and it's usually a waste of
time. Think of it like being a rock at the beach while internet
strangers are tiny grains of sand trying to grab your attention.
3) Seek more information about that
stranger's online behavior (i.e. their profile). Does the stranger
seem to judge quickly/engage in pointless fights/has a tendency to
argue/display other „abnormal“ behaviors?
This sometimes implies stranger is a
troublemaker, which is another sign for you that they should not be
engaged with. In some cases, strangers do have a record of discussing
a lot, with their intention being to actually reach out and learn,
rather than be right all the time. Trying to figure out intention is
important, just as much clarifying your intention in the right
situation is.
4) Is the stranger's account new (i.e.
less than a month old)?
New accounts sometimes happen to be
troll accounts. This is mostly because the stranger or troll either
1) got banned, muted or blocked on his main account, 2) does not dare
getting their main account in trouble or 3) recently created the
account because they got banned from other sites.
5) Would engaging with that stranger only
end up in defending yourself, rather than mutual discourse/exchange
of ideas?
Connected to point 1) and 2). Often
people only engage in discussion to prove they're right, rather than
to enhance their perspective or world view. Often people just talk at
each other instead of talking to each other. True exchange of ideas
or experiences happens very rarely. If you want to enhance your online
experience, this is a very important point to consider.
If you answered at least two of these
questions with yes, then engaging a discussion here may not be worth
it. Further steps may include muting or blocking that person if
unpleasant replies persist, but I'll save this for another article.
You are of course always free to
violate these as you like, as different situations often require
different treatment. If you find anything to add, please let me know.
